Church of Lies by Flora Jessop

Church of Lies by Flora Jessop
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I sometimes have a really hard time writing a review of a memoir, because I feel like I'm critiquing the person's life, and not the book itself - isn't it one and the same? This one is no different.

I had a really, really hard time liking Flora Jessop, though naturally I felt sympathy for what she went through. But she's awfully big on martyrdom, the "poor me" syndrome (which I can't get, because I can't imagine what she went through), but she also constantly praises herself for how awesome she is, even when she's doing drugs and stripping. I understand that, too - lack of self confidence usually turns into a "look at me, look at how great I am!"

The big thing that really bugged me about the whole book, and made me doubt a lot of what Flora said, was the one line she devotes to quitting drugs - she basically just says "I decided to stop, so I did". I've never done drugs, never even smoked a cigarette, but I've never heard of anyone quitting drugs by just deciding to. You're telling me she never once looked back? She never once struggled with her addiction? I get that her drug abuse wasn't the story here - saving the kids from abuse is - but it really bugged me that she just casually mentions quitting drugs & never mentions it again. What else was she over simplifying?

She also makes out that she's the only person ever who tries to rescue the kids and she's the only one ever in the whole world who could possibly actually rescue a child - and that's just not true. She likes to paint CPS as the bad guys, but that's discrimination - claiming everyone who works there is a bad guy is as bad as any other discrimination/racism/etc. CPS is trying to work within the laws of our country - for better or for worse. I'm not saying that they are actually helping the kids - clearly, they aren't - but they are trying to follow the law, and that doesn't make someone working for CPS as evil, just someone who's trying to follow the law.

View all my reviews

Heaven's Harlots: My Fifteen Years as a Sacred Prostitute in the Children of God Cult by Miriam Williams

Heaven's Harlots: My Fifteen Years as a Sacred Prostitute in the Children of God Cult by Miriam Williams
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I definitely have a thing for reading memoirs and books about cults - I'm a bit obsessed, truth be told. I was born in 76, and had really only heard of this cult before, but other than the name and that it was a cult, knew nothing at all about it. I prefer autobiographies to memoirs but actually read more memoirs than autobiographies, and this book was the first book I found through interlibrary loan when the time came to read about this cult.

Williams is clearly not an accomplished writer; her book reads very flat. That being said, her life is fascinating. You can clearly tell she's censoring herself a lot, and I do get that, but on the other hand, she was the one who chose to write this book, you can't now only share half your story, and you definitely get the impression that that is what she is doing here.

Her constant, reoccuring theme throughout the book is how she would do absolutely anything to protect her children and claims she finally leaves the cult because of her children, when that's clearly not true. I also really hated the fact that she constantly talks about how much she loves her children (plural) and constantly tries to tell us what she did that made her such a good mother, when in fact she mainly obsesses over her oldest child, and mainly puts him (and her other children) in harm's way, rationalizing that she's in fact exposing them to emotional and psychological abuse. Williams seems more interested in telling us what a good mother she is, then in actually sharing her experiences in a cult.

I also was surprised, when she finally got to how she left the cult, by how she actually left. Without spoiling the book for you, she constantly tells us how she left the cult because she wanted to save her children, when it seems more like she just got left behind. The whole thing reads as a story, and I wonder where the truth actually lies.

View all my reviews

Cult Insanity

Cult Insanity: A Memoir of Polygamy, Prophets, and Blood Atonement by Irene Spencer
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This is Spencer's second book, and you definitely have to read her first book to follow this one. There are a lot of characters to keep track of, and even her explanations of who characters were didn't really help me much.

Spencer seems to write her story without really sharing what she went through - she did this already in her first book - but the memoir comes across as detached because she's not sharing her memories and feelings so much as sharing dry facts as to what happened when she was a part of this crazy family.

It's a book worth reading, to be sure, if you are interested in polygamy, but it's not a book for someone who wants to read a casual memoir on any subject, and there are honestly a lot better books about polygamy out there (like Spencer's first book or Spencer's sister wife's book)

View all my reviews

Beyond Belief: My Secret Life Inside Scientology and My Harrowing Escape by Jenna Miscavige Hill

Beyond Belief: My Secret Life Inside Scientology and My Harrowing Escape by Jenna Miscavige Hill
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I read this book back in Oct 2013, but as always, I needed a little bit of time to think about the book before I wrote my review. I also youtubed Jenna Hill and got more of a personal insight by watching her on video (and I admit, I liked her less after watching her in person then after reading her book. On TV, she comes across as looking for her five minutes of fame; in the book, she seems more "real").

Jenna grows up in a scientology family - something I only had the vaguest ideas about before reading this book. After she becomes an adult, she marries and becomes a scientologist in her own right.

Her childhood is filled with a variety of abuses and things most people don't have to deal with in their every day lives: from chanting and lack of privacy, to controlled public punishment for imagined wrongdoings, to a uniform dress code, isolation from the rest of the world (and told that the rest of the world is "bad"), to doctrines that are never quite explained, to out and out abuse like slave labor, mental and physical abuse, public humiliation, and let's not forget brainwashing.

Jenna's writing throughout is a bit childish, as is her story, but as she was a child during most of the book, that makes sense & isn't necessarily a negative, as you really do feel for her. I do feel like she enjoyed throwing herself a pity party - not saying she didn't deserve our pity, mind you. My biggest point for mentioning this is that Jenna, sadly, does not seem to grow at all as a person within the pages of this book.







View all my reviews

Hidden Wives by Claire Avery

Hidden Wives by Claire Avery
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

it was okay, but the story was a little too neat and perfect (aka not realistic because the story just fell into place). I much prefer memoirs to fiction when it comes to polygamy books

View all my reviews

His Favorite Wife

His Favorite Wife: Trapped in Polygamy by Susan Ray Schmidt
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This book is one of a few similar books I read back in October on various religions/faiths/cults, and didn't review at the time - mostly because books like this I have to think about for a little while in order to get my thoughts into place. It's always very difficult for me to review a biography or a memoir because I feel like I'm reviewing someone's life and how can anyone do that? Or be so bold as to do that?

Susan's story is about how she marries at age 15 to a man twice her age, who already has many wives, and continues to marry and have more and more children. Her husband at times seems evil and cruel, yet at others seems to genuinely care for Susan as much as he is able - which isn't much, considering all the other wives, children, and demands on his attention.

He (I feel bad, I can't remember her husband's name) continually puts his faith, his brothers, and himself before any of his wives, including Susan the so called favorite wife.

That being said, Susan does a great job showing you her life and her horrors, but letting the reader draw their own conclusions. She ends up leaving her husband and takes her kids with her, makes a few mistakes but ends up happily married at the end.

Anyone who is interested in learning about other cultures or faiths should read this one.

View all my reviews

Shattered Dreams: My Life as a Polygamist's Wife by Irene Spencer

Shattered Dreams: My Life as a Polygamist's Wife by Irene Spencer
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I read Irene's book after reading her sister-wives book. Irene's story is heart breaking in her own right, but because she was older than Susan and an earlier wife, poor Irene has to live through so much more.

I enjoyed Irene's writing style, which was down to earth and straight forward. The book does seem to drag a bit, only because so much is similar - "Hey, I want to marry another wife" "No, I don't want you to marry again" "Tough luck", oh look another wife. Over and over again.

OK let's move to another dirt poor area and live where there's no heat... "NO, I don't want to" "Tough luck" oh look, another move.

Poor Irene, Through it all you really do feel bad for her. Irene really struggles with jealously throughout the book, natural enough, and by then end you are really rooting for her. You do have to question why she stays with her husband so long. But how she manages to survive is why this book is worth reading.







View all my reviews

Fifty Years in Polygamy

Fifty Years in Polygamy: Big Secrets, Little White Lies by Kristyn Decker
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I read a lot of biographies & have read a few on polygamy, and was interested in reading Decker's story/memoir about her life in polygamy. I always have a really, really hard time in reviewing memoirs because I feel like I'm reviewing a person's life, not their book, and how does one review someone's life?

Kristyn (born Sophia) was born into polygamy, raised in the faith, and married into the faith. Unlike most of tales of polygamy, Sophia "only" had one sister wife, so her book was really interesting because it was so different. Her life was full of abuse (sexual, emotional & physical) and lived a life of neglect and poverty, which caused her much mental distress (including an addiction to food).

That being said, I found it very difficult to get into the book based upon Decker's very choppy writing style (my review copy was also full of numerous spacing issues, from lack of spacing between words to lack of spacing between paragraphs, all of which I assume is fixed in the final version). Sophia/Kristyn was also very, very, very good at "playing the martyr". I'm sure you have one of those in your life, where no matter what, the person just isn't happy, is always the wronged one, is always the one making the big sacrifices, is always bending over backwards to make everyone else happy and of course, they are perfect in every single way. Between Sophia's constant playing the martyr/"poor me" syndrome, her constant "foreseeing" of truths (i.e. she "knew" what sex her children would be; she knew various men were perverts; she "knew" when one of her kids was in trouble; she "knew" she was going to have one more child because her future child "spoke" to her, etc etc), her constant back and forth ranting and raving, etc., it made it very hard for me to like Sophia.

On the other hand, that was the whole point of the book. This is a memoir, after all, and it's here to tell Kristyn's/Sophia's story of polygamy, and naturally that includes all the horror stories often associated with stories of polygamy, like incest, abuse, poverty, jealous, hatred, etc. She's telling her side of it, and no matter what, you have to feel for what she went through.

And regardless, it's a fascinating tale that will get you to learn about a lifestyle that's probably way, way different from your own.

-
I received a copy of this book in exchange for my honest opinion/review.

View all my reviews

Becoming Sister Wives

Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage by Kody Brown
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This is another book I read months ago but had to spend some time thinking about it before I had to read it.

This is the story that goes along with the TV show, Sister Wives. I admit, I'm a fan of the show. Do I believe it's all true? No, no reality show is gonna be that - the editors are going to pick and choose what scenes to show to share the story they want to tell. It's still fascinating to me all the same, all the more so as the kids are getting older and going off to college.

The book is told by Kody Brown and his wives. A lot of the information is the same as the show, but there's some new information presented here as well - especially the early years, when Kody Brown had just one or two wives. Meri was truly horrible to her sister wife back then, and it's really unclear how she feels about it now. The wives all struggle with jealousy, which is understandable, and you do see some small insights into that in this book as well - how they handle it.

Whether or not you agree with their lifestyle and choices, it's still an interesting read and if you enjoy watching the show, you'll most likely enjoy the book as well. I watch the show - and read books like this - because I enjoy learning about other lifestyles and cultures, and because more often then not, the truth is stranger than fiction.

If you are looking for more information about their faith, and what they believe - that's not covered in this book, as it's a 'personal' thing. This book is about their lives and relationships, not their faith.

View all my reviews

Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage by Kody Brown

Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage by Kody Brown
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This is another book I read months ago but had to spend some time thinking about it before I had to read it.

This is the story that goes along with the TV show, Sister Wives. I admit, I'm a fan of the show. Do I believe it's all true? No, no reality show is gonna be that - the editors are going to pick and choose what scenes to show to share the story they want to tell. It's still fascinating to me all the same, all the more so as the kids are getting older and going off to college.

The book is told by Kody Brown and his wives. A lot of the information is the same as the show, but there's some new information presented here as well - especially the early years, when Kody Brown had just one or two wives. Meri was truly horrible to her sister wife back then, and it's really unclear how she feels about it now. The wives all struggle with jealousy, which is understandable, and you do see some small insights into that in this book as well - how they handle it.

Whether or not you agree with their lifestyle and choices, it's still an interesting read and if you enjoy watching the show, you'll most likely enjoy the book as well. I watch the show - and read books like this - because I enjoy learning about other lifestyles and cultures, and because more often then not, the truth is stranger than fiction.

If you are looking for more information about their faith, and what they believe - that's not covered in this book, as it's a 'personal' thing. This book is about their lives and relationships, not their faith.

View all my reviews